Type2 People

This month, I had privilege to finally complete one of my life's big responsibility, My Sister's Marriage. I had dreamed, thought about it since some past 10 years probably imagining it with hyped fancy stuffs like it would happen somewhere at this place, something like this and something like that. I had built up this all imaginary stuffs a decade back. As years passed by, the reality filter started to apply on my imaginary stuffs. You might not believe, but I had dreamt planned of sister's marriage to be great & be perfect than mine. I never had imagined my own!

Last week, once marriage ceremony was completed and when I had some lonely moment to gaze around my thoughts, I remembered how silly & over hyped expectations were my decade back dreams. Nevertheless, I tried my best for it be as good as possible. By performing this wedding, I experienced few unforgettable lessons of life. Due to word limits of this blog to not become over-lengthy, I am constrained to share only one lesson over here.

Recently, I had watched a whatsapp forwarded video of a Chinese motivational speaker talking about practise makes anyone to master any art in this world. He explained with subtle examples of how doing the same thing repetitively makes it perfect. If you observe someone paints really beautiful, thats because of hard practise. One who might seem to walk carelessly and freely on a rope is because of continuous practise. Anyone cannot walk on a rope and thats certainly because of lack of practise. Whatever be the action, it has been mastered using practise. Be it writing a blog, child learning to talk/walk, an olympic gold medalist, well known singer etc. If someone keeps on doing the same thing again and again, then he gets equipped to do the same thing once again, no matter what! If a person is always lazy, he always tends to be lazy no matter what could be the situation. Similarly, if a rich guy practises to over-spend money, even when he is full debt, he try to do the same spending (even sometimes by borrowing).

For the wedding process, I was planning, how much ever I can, for it to be perfect. Whatever is in my hand and capability, I ensured that its fulfilled and good for people who attend. Every minute detail which I can think-of was covered. But of-course, its the wedding, not some small any other regular normal event to go everything as planned. Lots of diverse people meet and greet during this time. I witnessed two types of people. Type1 are people who adapted/adjusted along with the situation/place keeping the big picture of wedding in the mind while few didn't(Type2). They started complaining. As I told earlier, my side efforts were full and I tried my level best to ensure it to resolve which ever were in my hand. Certainly there were few things which were absolutely not under my control and I was helpless. I felt so bad that they have to go through few of these inconveniences and I cannot do anything.

But I have witnessed few people who doesn't stop complaining at all. Its not just in marriage but I have interacted with these kind of people earlier also. I had never understood them. When they complained, I tried to resolve it even if it wasn't in my hand. Before one complain gets any feasible outcome, already they were ready with another complain. Its like never ending. I was tired on satisfying every needs. Whatever you do, they'll will come up with excellent new complain. The complains were really unique which sometimes makes me wonder on how do they come up with such astonishing complaint. Hats off! It must be an art.

I am really thankful that not much of type2 people were during this wedding. I always use to wonder on how to deal with these kind of type2 peoples. During wedding, understanding my nervousness, a well wisher told me that "No matter what you do, they are not going to stop complaining. You do your things which are important and just ignore them. Don't care much". I felt so relieved hearing this and thankful for making me realise this.

At this moment, I realised this Chinese guy's talk which I mentioned earlier. I thought, most probably, these peoples have been practicing complaining about anything in their life from past so many years that they have mastered it well. Hence no matter, what the situation is or how good it is, they figure out reason to complain. I refer them as type2 people. These people lack empathy. According to me, they need to stand in other's position and make an effort to think before what they are complaining. They should think, If this is the right person to complain; Is he in a position to help in anyway to resolve; Is there any outcome if I complain it to this person in any manner. I really think they don't think anything like this. Their mastery of art is to complain and they just do it casually.

Similarly there are various kinds of type2 people. I met another kind during distribution of invitation cards. These people just advice (similar to complain). They have been practising giving free advice for so long that, now they can give any advice on any damn matter on this earth even if you don't ask. I use to consider them seriously and use to feel bad that I am not doing the right way while these type2 people advised the right way. But this wedding process has made me realise the truth. You need to just listen, say "yes" and plainly ignore. Do whatever is feasible, practical and you feel is right and you are capable of which is already planned rather than listening to type2 free advisers.

I have been meeting, interacting with type2 people earlier but never understood two questions. One, "why are these people like this?" Two, "what to do with them?" These two questions always haunted me and I felt bad. During this month of December, I finally found answers to these questions - "They are as they are because of long practise from past" and "just ignore them".

Lets keep in mind these answers and say Good Bye to year 2016. I don't know about others but certainly 2016 was memorable for me. This year will be remembered for a really long time in future. With that thought and hoping for another memorable year ahead, lets welcome new year 2017 on positive note.

Happy New Year 2017 in advance.