There is an instrument to measure temperature - thermometer, there is an instrument to measure electricity - electrometer, similarly by wondering in my thoughts, i invented a meter to measure 'respect', which i call it as "respectometer" ;-) sounds fun, isn't it? So this is an imaginary instrument which will measure the respect. Lets see, what exactly do i mean by measuring respect & how did this come into my little mind?
According to me, in a way, this whole big world runs on 'respect'. Respect, is what is driving our day-to-day actions. Including the big-big business deals at corporate level & big-big relationships like marriage are built on respect to each other. Without respect, its hard to imagine our lives.
According to me there are basically 3 types of respect.
1. Mutual Respect
2. Self Respect
3. One sided Respect
Let me give bit detail on these 3 types of respect. But before that, i'll try to define 'respect' according to me. I struggled a lot to put the definition into sentence & finally this is what i penned down :-
"Assume yourself or your friend or colleague or parents or a superstar or your manager or your teacher or somebody you know. I hope you believe that there is some kind of 'feeling' or 'something' between you both which makes you believe in each other. According to me, that is what is respect."
Mutual Respect :-
This kind of respect is between two or more persons. For example, you and your friend share a mutual respect with each other. That is what is driving your actions among each other. You respect him and he respects you back. In the sense, you believe in him & understand & agree & follow him and the same he does back to you. No need to mention further, i hope you might imagine what i mean by mutual respect. Consider any other individual (brother, teacher, driver, colleague your doctor anyone) or group (your team, your class) whom you respect & most important is that he/they should & must respect you back then only it is called Mutual Respect. Respect should be to'n'fro to become mutual.
Self Respect :-
This is, as the name suggests, is the respect with your-self. Your own Self. That is, how much you believe understand, agree & follow yourself, your own thoughts. This kind of respect is very essential for each individual's personal growth.
One sided Respect :-
This is kinda fun. I never imagined there can be this kind of respect too. Initially i had written this whole blog with explaining only first two kinds of respect, but then while trying to figure out more accurate definition of respect, i come with this new type of respect. Like one sided love, this is one sided respect ;-) Then i re-wrote the blog with 3 types.
Well, one sided respect is like, you respect some person & that other person might even doesn't know you at all. In the way, they cannot be able to respect you back, but you respect them a lot. Let me give an example to clear this out.
Consider my favorite hero, SRK. I certainly have a lot of respect for him but obviously he doesn't even know me. So no chance of SRK respecting me back. This is what i define, one sided respect. Respect in the sense, i like him, i believe what he says on shows/movies & sometimes i do try to follow him.
Well, i'll come back to this point later about SRK, but consider another example.
How many of you remember, shaktimaan? :-) That was all children's best-est serial on DD1 in early 90's, which use to air at 11:30AM on Saturday's (and repetition on Tuesday night 10:30). At the end, shaktimaan use to give some tips to children & almost all try to believe him, trust him & use to follow his words. That is the one sided respect. Example might be silly & old but someone for sure will be there for you in your real life with whom you share one sided respect.
Well, enough about types of respect and back to my imaginary instrument, respectometer, which by end of this blog, i'll be handing over to you to measure and use by yourself.
In our daily day-to-day life, to get along each & every day, we need to respect so many people around us & get respect back by others. Not only just keeping & getting respect, we should also maintain the respect earned & do our actions so as to increase it. By doing so, our daily actions are smooth. Other person's respect on you makes your work/action worth doing by him & similarly your work/action's worth is based on the respect upon other. Among so many people with so many deals & relationships around us, its very hard to judge whether the person is showing genuine respect or just faking. In this cunning & competitive world, people might fake or play around with your emotions as though showing respect to just get the work done out of you. Its hard to find out whether the person is acting or whether he's having genuine respect. Personally i struggled a lot during past couple of years in understanding this.
But recently i have found out a simply way to figure out the scale of respect what other individual pays to you. You know according to me, second person is proportionally respectful to you as how much he listens/understands/follows your words/thoughts into actions! Kinda hard to understand but you can pick up the lines slowly what i'm trying to convey.
Measuring respect is observing whether other individual is trying to translate your thoughts/words, which you genuinely express, into actions. For example, Suppose i asked my friend to get Barfi movie in pen drive & he promised to get it tomorrow. If he slips or think doing something else is important than keeping his promise to me, then he may not be having too much of respect on me. Probably he might think, he can lie me that he didn't get time & will get it next day. My respectometer will read very low measurement for him. But even if he was busy and since he had promised me, he took out 5 mins out & brought movie in pen drive & gave it to me tomorrow, then my respectometer will read a high reading. Even if he doesn't get it, but told honestly the reason for not getting, then also reading will be high.
Example given may sound silly but catch the grisp of my respectometer instrument here. Apply this in serious matter, it might be useful.
Also once you turn other individual's thought's into actions by showing respect to them, then the other individuals respect for you also grows proportionally. Example, in our office, there are two cabs for going back to home. One at 5:15PM & another at 7:30PM. Suppose my manager assigned some work & asked me to finish asap. It depends on how much do i respect my work & him which will decide whether i finish off work by staying late & going by 7:30 or do i think, "manager will be telling to finish today, that's his work but i'll do it by coming tomorrow morning" & choose to leave by 5:15. If you choose 7:30, then respect from manager to you would increase proportionally, which might help you while getting leaves/appraisal ;-)
Examples which i give in my blog will be simple & silly to understand the basic intention. Please don't judge just on that. Realize & apply the same concept around you, in your own surrounding, then you'll appreciate the idea behind the thought.
As i said, it depends on the genuine concern which you express & the particular action for that genuine concern will measure the respect. For one thing, don't try to judge by telling too many silly things & expecting them into actions from other individual! Its insane! Use this for genuine & real concerns. What i mean is, don't keep saying silly things to other individual & judge them since they didn't turn them into actions. Don't use respectometer instrument for judging silly things & blame me back that my idea of respectometer is faltu :-P
So coming to measuring self respect my respectometer will help you to analyze and know yourself about "how much do i respect myself". Simple thing is just note down your thoughts, what all you want to do. What you speak off daily & think about of doing. I'm sure there will be several. If you turn your thoughts of doing what you intended to do into actions then my respectometer will read high value for you. Very simple example is long time back, i had thought myself that, every month i'll be writing a blog. Whatever may be the subject, however bad it may be, but i will not stop writing. This is my 10th continuous blog. Since past 10 months i'm following my thought & my respectometer is reading good value for me in this matter. Simple evaluation. Another example where my respectometer would measure low for me is that i had also thought of writing dairy daily, but i always fail to do so with one or the other excuse to myself.
Similarly you can judge yourself with respectometer about your self respect.
Finally coming down to measuring one sided respect. I don't know, whether my respectometer would be a good instrument to measure this, but i would like to continue a small note on SRK from where i had left. As i said, SRK was my fav hero. I had great respect for him. In a way, respectometer use to read high value for him ;-). Recently when he started KKR or somewhere during that time, suddenly my respect for him fall down. I don't know why. But the strange thing which i want to highlight here & which is limitation of respectometer is that, when i had respect for him, even if he did something bad or mean thing, i use to over look that fact & use to like him, but once he lost respect, even if he did great things, i wasn't able to look at it and always think of -ve points about him. Example is on SRK, but similar thing would happen with your respect on somebody too in your daily life. Be cautious.
One more thing about one sided respect is that, you see lot of commercials these days with big & leading actors anchoring & promoting them. The marketing people use the one-sided respect upon the celebrity as business factor to sell their product. I hope by now, you got my idea.
You know, i can go on & on & on but the length will increase & it gets boring. So i hope you catch, what i'm trying to convey. Respect is a very essential & vital part of us. Do understand this fact & use my respectometer as now you are also equipped with it.'Handle with care' ;-)
